yes- writers are egomanics and control freaks

how do you let go of something.. of someone.. how can you really believe that bullshit that "its better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all" when you were better off without having felt that high and come crashing down? does that mean it wasnt love and it was temporary insanity? its not temporary if it never goes away. had a really fucked up dream last night where i realized i went wrong and the exact moment when- high school. actually even good dreams are always a good source of misery so maybe i should call it a nightmare. no one died or got hurt and nothing scary happened, but something i cant have did and waking up without it made me feel empty so it might as well have been a nightmare. the sad thing is this happens almost every night. burying yourself in memories is a way to die and not be forgotten- or at least not forget anyone else. and when you're living in the past you forget who you are anyway. blah. can i just fast forward to the future where everything is better than this? i mean it has to get better, right? i think that's the hope and thought that gets us through each day. even if it's full of shit. if you lose hope that things WILL get better, you'll just be another statistic that gave up too soon or maybe not soon enough. so if you ever have that hope? hold onto it.