you eating your words for supper is only comforting if you choke

"and yeah i cried."
saying this to a brick wall, someone that wouldn't even hand you sandpaper to dry your tears.
theres a list and youre not at the top.
you can shrug it off but its still there.
write til the pen runs out of ink, cold blood still ru(i)ns her viens.
"does it make you feel better to know that- do you feel anything at all?"
piss on the grave of the last person who cared if you're still standing.
life only looks okay from 60 mph when you're not able to pay attention to the details laying roadside.
out of sight and out of(your) mind-
though really im still out of your mind when im in the same room.
"you were hurt when you were a kid- but i'm not going to hurt you and you're not a kid anymore."
this results in maybe a blink. maybe a click.
it's easy to say and ignore what you dont wanna hear and even easier to hurt someone else than it is to care.
spring cleaning to her is putting you on the shelf.
swept under the rug for safe keeping or safe out of sight of anyone that might look down on the mess youve left lying around.
lying. funny how you hate liars but you are slowly turning into the worst one ive known- or is it best?
either way..
she doesnt care who is starving when she has food on her plate
she doesnt care who is homeless from under the roof over her head
she doesnt care whos alone when shes got someone else to turn to
she doesnt care about headaches as long as its not in her head
or heartaches outside of her own chest
words are useless to her cause she has no use for you.
i just cant deal with someone that doesnt give a shit about anyone but themselves.
backspace, delete, x out, hang up, log out, caps locks on and sign off.
my head and heart hurt and i cant let you do this to me anymore.