everything has an expiration date.

I always have the urge to hit the "stop" button in the elevator just to see what happens. Maybe someday I will- it seems like Im always pushing buttons and all the wrong ones, right? I only push you away because I know youll let me and I need someone that wont. File me between the pages of forgotten and forgetting. Reminese a time when I mattered and remember it the way scientists remember dinosaurs. Talk about it like you were ever there. Waste time thinking instead of doing. What interested me days ago just bores me now. You overuse the word perfect. You cant use it for two people- unless theyre the exact sam eand I know were not so Im calling you on your bullshit. All I wanted was a little of your time. I want all the things you cant buy like to be needed by someone and stability. Sure- theres always something better waiting just around the corner but it takes all my strength to get there anymore. Its easier to cry and give up a few feet away. I still have a notepad open with things I was going to say three days ago. Expired. Maybe Ill x out of it. The kicked puppy finally finds a way to run away from home and realizes how alone he is. Youll always leave me alone this way. With eyes that dont know if they want to cry or wake up. Its easier to just let them win sometimes. I think you like to make me suffer and its the only way I can make you happy so I let you do it. Well, and Ill still do it...while theres still anything left of me to walk on. I try to tell myself how youre not even worth it but what choice do I have.