the person you made me think you were.

i'm ok, mostly because i realize every word i ever said wasn't about you- it was just about who i thought you were.

soo if you're wondering why i'm coping so well, think of it this way- you watch a certain movie and fall in love with the main character instantly- (like especially if the main character is played by johnny depp or is borat, just saying) but anyways the main character is always amazing, funny, charming, they have traits you never imagined anyone could have. you would date them if you could. in some ways you connect to them, and you find parts of you in them. then the movie ends and the lights come back on in the theatre and you realize the person doesn't exist. you're alone and still in the same seat as when it started. you look at your hands and you're real- but what you spent time of your life thinking about, watching, wanting- isn't. it's a bummer when it hits you everything is fiction but there's nothing that can be done about it. so really, this is just the ending credits and there won't be a sequel. you don't exist, but everyone watching you wishes you did. everyone will wake up in time. so cling now while you can before you lose them too.

that's why the games you're pulling and things you're doing don't effect me anymore. the worst thing i ever came up with or came down from. when the lights come back on you're already gone.